It was on 4th September, 1991 that my eldest son, Dr. Anand became seriously ill and was on death bed; 1 was upset. It was my faith in Swami that inspired me and gave me strength in this state of mental disturbance. I decided to rush to Bombay and seek immediate medical assistance. I took Anand to Beach Candy Hospital, where perfect treatment was meted out and Anand got a second lease of life. I always used to convey on telephone important developments to Dr. Gokak, who I was always called 'Papa'. But this time, I could not do so, because Dr. Gokak was himself sick. I did not like to disturb him in his illness. After Anand recovered fully, I took him and my daughter, Dr. Rashmi to pay respects to my revered Papa.
In my state of excitement to meet him, time flew and the three of us reached his residence, named "Suruchi", and stepped into the drawing room. Dr. Gokak was informed of our arrival and he came to meet me, walking slowly with the support of a stick, accompanied by Amma (Mrs. Gokak). I was overwhelmed with emotion. I touched his feet with tears, both of joy and sorrow, flowing from my eyes; joy at meeting him and sorrow, because he was not well and also because of remembering my recent tension-ridden days. My reverence for him was spontaneous and immediately, I said, "Papa, I love you."
"My child, I know it. I, too, love you," said he. Then, he diverted my attention and asked me, "What happened to your book, Spirituality and Health, which was edited by me on 15.11.1990? Did you do what I told you to do about the book?" I replied, "Yes, Papa. The manuscript copy duly typed was blessed by Swami twice and I had handed it over to the Trust for publication. Now, the book is lying with Baba and has not been published yet." Dr. Gokak remarked, "Once, I had written a book, which continued to rest with Swami for four years and after that, it was published as per the manuscript. Baba knows how to do, when to do, and which is the appropriate time to do a thing." He then indicated that I should sit on the chair and asked with his usual smile, "Well, now, tell me why your book has not been published so far." I replied that, "As a procedure in the medical colleges, a thesis is prepared and written by a medical student and submitted to the competent authority, who, in turn, very keenly watches whether the student in his daily routine brings into practice what he has written in his thesis and the student is not allowed to clear his examination till he does so. This is exactly what has happened to me. My book contains many things to be practised and Baba is watching whether I am sincerely practising what I am preaching in my book. I feel I am failing in this direction and I have to practise a lot to achieve a goal."
Dr. Gokak said, "I am happy that you understand. But, I want to write many more books on the subject concerning Baba's preaching, because Baba in His speeches on medical science speaks elaborately, which non-medico devotees like us are not capable of understanding. But, you, having full knowledge of Allopathy, Homoeopathy, and Ayurveda, can interpret medical aspects of Baba's speeches and lectures in a better manner."
I confessed to Dr. Gokak that I was aware of my limitations of being a doctor and of not being a writer; with such limitations, how did he expect me to write a book on the incarnation? Dr. Gokak cleared my doubts very beautifully, when he told me that he did not want me to write a book, but merely to highlight medical aspects deep rooted in Swami's speeches and compile them systematically in the form of articles.
"Ek Omkar Satya Nam Karta Puruk, Nirbhay, Nirver, Akal Mürat, Ajuni Sahab Bhang, Gurprasad," says Guru Nanak. This is the Mal mantra of Adi Guru Granth Sahib and it means thus: God is one and His name is Omkaram. He is Satya; He is the only Doer; He is the only Purusa (Potent) and the rest on this Earth are Naris (Females); He is beyond Birth and Dealth. It is the body, which is perishable and perishes (dies). The Soul (Atma), having origin from Paramatma, Never Dies. Paramatma (God) is perfect and complete in Himself. He is Purana in all respects. The Nearness to God possessing all the above attributes, Gunas, can be achieved only by Guru Krpa (Guru's Grace).
Born in a Sikh family and having a religious background, I was initiated in the recitation of Jab-Ji-Saheb and Path of Guru Granth Sahib. As a child, I had deep desire and craving to have a Guru, a genuine Guru. During my childhood days, I was looked after and brought up by Savitri Malik. This lady, who was a devotee of Lord Krishna and a singer of Meera's Bhajans, had a great impact on the development of my personality. Over a period of time, I developed a fascination for her Bhajans, though I never understood the importance of these Bhajans.
The inner significance and meaning of those Bhajans became clear to me, when I came into the fold of Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba.
My desire to sing the glory of God was fulfilled, when I happened to meet a Sikh saint from Jammu-Kashmir. This saint inspired me to sing Sabads (Bhajans) in the Gurudwara. I still remember some of my favourite Bhajans:-
1) "Meharban, Meharban Sahin Mera Meharban. Tu Kathe Dolley Praniya, Teri Pat Rakhe Bhagavan." My God is very merciful, why is my soul worried? God is there to look after all of us.
2) "Rasna Voi Jo Hari Guy Gave." The tongue should always sing the glory of God.
As mentioned above, although I sang Bhajans, I did not know the real meaning of such Bhajans. Baba, in His discourses, has beautifully explained what a Bhajan is and why it should be sung. He says that, the Bhajan singer must first form an image of his chosen God (Ista Devata) in his Mind (Manas) and then, Bhajan should be sung with the voice, full of emotion (Bhāva) originating from the depth of the heart, i.e. from the navel region. If it is so, you will be surprised to know that Bhajans shake the Universal Consciousness and vibrate in the ether, where waves are formed just like ripples in a placid pond when a stone is thrown into it. Such vibrations are in the circular form and are very small initially, but go on enlarging as they advance. These sound waves ultimately reach the destination, the Name, i.e., God (Isța Devata). Such sound waves, once created, cover the distance like a bullet and quickly reach the target, the Isța Devata.
Meera Bai asks her mind to let its concentration dwell at the mid brow between the two eyes, where the two Nādis namely, Ida and Pingala, met the third one called Suşumna.
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